I was just listening to a mentor of mine on a Facebook Live business meeting, and he said the phrase, “It is easier to Give Birth than it is to Raise The Dead!”
OMG! Talk about the EXACT thing I needed to hear!
And BEFORE anyone who loves me and reads this jumps to any conclusions, I am FINE! I just need to learn when it is time to let some things go so I can move forward in a MORE Positive Light! ❤
Recently, I have been feeling very defeated and lost. ESPECIALLY in my businesses! I keep chasing after the same people, because they said they would be there. And my heart WANTS to still help them, that is why I do what I do! Well……sometimes life happens, sometimes feelings and/or loyalties change, and sometimes people simply decide you aren’t worth their time anymore. Isn’t necessarily a bad thing, just the facts of life AND/OR business!
Not everyone is a fit for your life. And not everyone who says they are your friend or colleague really wants to see you succeed. It could be many things. Jealousy? Fear of Change? Misunderstanding? Drifting apart? Different Goals? Different priorities? MANY Things! And although it is sometimes difficult to remember, not everyone wants to be, or for that fact, BELONGS in your circle. What DOES matter is learning your own worth. And remembering that when others don’t see your worth, THAT’S OK! They simply weren’t meant to be part of your life. At least not forever. maybe they were there for a learning season of your life. And seasons inevitably change.
I have been chasing after the same people for months. Some for YEARS! But today I realized that if I need to chase them, that they may not be my people. I miss some people SO MUCH that it is hard for me to let go, but if they don’t want to be a part my world enough to actually be here, then maybe I need to stop begging them to be a part of it.
That is a HARD pill for me to swallow! Believe me! I HATE giving up on people, because I am an eternal optimist and BELIEVE that there is good in everyone, and that their good should mesh with MY good. But that is not how it always works out. So I have to learn to let them go and just BREATHE.
Sometimes that means let go forever, sometimes that means that a person slips from one part of your life to another. A loved one becomes a friend. A friend becomes an acquaintance. An acquaintance becomes someone you say hi to in public. Or a colleague becomes someone who doesn’t give you the time of day. It’s OK! Not everyone was meant to be part of your life forever! If you get a few of those in your lifetime, consider yourself LUCKY!
Many times in my life, I have looked at letting go as a personal failure. Even when I knew it was best for me and/or the other person. Let go of one of the greatest loves of my life that way. And I truly felt that I had failed at life and may never be given a second chance.
I myself often feel personal responsibility and guilt for people leaving me. Thinking it HAD to be something I did! HAD to be something deeply unlikable about me. But it is destructive having that low of an opinion of yourself. As a kid, I was once told that it was my fault that my family wasn’t in a better place. That my “mental” issues were more of an inconvenience, and not the deeply disturbing situation that they were to me. Not only at the time, but for my entire life. In my head, lives a constant reminder that I was at one time told that I was “THE problem”. I know I made life more difficult, but feeling like a disappointment and that the burden of all life’s happiness was taken away because I ruined it by having “problems”, lead to a life of me trying to win people’s love and sometimes fight to win it BACK! But learning that sometimes you have to know when it is time to let go so the energy wasted on trying to raise the dead can be focused towards giving birth to the new.
