Make It Stop

I try to see the light
See what could be
Pretend that all is well
But there are days
Days like today
The pain is excruciating
Usually the mask fits better
Can’t take it tonight
I miss My Girls
H and O have been gone too long
Miss Bourbon can only do so much
Little Miss CBD sometimes eases the edge
Give me the relaxers
Give me the hallucinogens
Where is my temporary escape
It has been years.
Tolerance is waning
Weakness is looming
Can I prevail?
Can I stay clear?
I believe in Me
But the pain!
Why does it have to hurt so much?
Why can’t it give me a break?
Some days I wish
Some days I wonder
Some days I want to kick the shit
out of myself for being weak.
But I keep finding a way
To make it through another tomorrow
To not grab the tempting ropes
The ones I know will bring relief
But praying not today
I’m passed that.
Right?!?
Time to sleep
The semicolon showed up
Tomorrow is waiting
I WILL survive!

Boo 1-8-22

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